Wall Street Protects the American Dream

Our Republican brothers having fallen before the scythe of temporary public opinion, the debate in the Senate has at last been joined.

The nation stands at one behind us. Okay, not right now, maybe -- but America's not gonna like it if the party really stops, that's for sure. Because while spending any time at all looking at us on TV might make you sick, we're still the only ones who can make you rich. Rich beyond your wildest dreams! Maybe not today, or next week, but soon, and for the rest of your lives! You want to give that up? We don't think so. That's why we're gonna fight for our right to par-tay! And we know in the end you're gonna stand behind us, ladies and gentlemen of Main Street, not those bummer dudes who want the music to stop forever. We hold your upside in our hands and always have. And you know it, right? Can we hear you say Yeah? Yeah! All those things you're angry about right now aren't abuses at all. They're rights we exercise in order to bring you the American Dream, which is now a global one. And we now assert those rights and will stand, shoulder to shoulder, to make sure they receive the protection they deserve to keep our System safe against those who would destroy it. Regulate us? Of course. Regulate away. Nobody's against regulation. But do not limit our ability to bet against our own products. That's the way the system works. There are two schools of thought on any investment. We want to represent both. You will see that on page 187 of our offering release on the Babaloo Fund, for instance, there is a disclaimer in Footnote iiiv informing careful readers of the various interlocking derivative nucleatides we have in motion on this. Perhaps it could have been larger. We'll do that next time. But don't mess with our right to hedge. If we can't hedge, an enormous leg of our industry will be ripped from its socket and the giant will tumble down for good. You want to see the Market at 3000 again? We know you don't.   Loading Comments...   1 2 3 Last » Next ›

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